Inside America

Writing most of my last posts for the American version of this blog, I almost forgot about the U.S. presidential campaign and did not report anything about it to my fellow French readers for months.

Following the recent European tour of the democratic candidate, I said a few words about “Eurobamania” as a guest on Virgomonkey’s blog (Obama rock star, popular in Europe, mobilizing crowds in Berlin, becoming Sarkozy’s buddy, and so on). But nothing the French did not already know about.  Even on vacation, the French could not escape the Obama mediatic phenomenon. However, those who are bloging from France may not have followed the return of Obama’s almost-presidential trip. For them, I wrote this short and quite objective report about the latest adventures of “the Star and the Hero.” (Sorry for Americans who are already tired with that story. I translate it from the French original post because French readers may also be interested in your comments on that).

Obama’s overwhelming media coverage (the Star) lately forced Senator McCain (the Hero) to play the guest. One must also say that the Hero struggles to bring grist to the campaign mill, or maybe should I rather say “to bring gas to the campaign pump”. The few ideas he’s hardly developing may be summarized on a bus ticket:

1. I jumped over Saigon, therefore I will be good at commanding to tanks and planes!

2. If oil is expensive, it’s because of the Arabs. So I will let Texaco drill more oil off the shores of Texas and California and in ten years, it will lower prices.

3. The Iraqis cannot do without us. So we should stay in Iraq a 100 years if necessary.

4. I don’t like taxes. You don’t like taxes. Nobody likes taxes. So We will lower taxes.

Period. Go to the polls.

So as the campaign is going to last three more months, and because his staff is too lazy to find a better idea, the new strategy of the Hero is to attack the Star for what he is – a Star – rather than for what he says – too complicated -. “The campaign turns negative” chroniclers say. But if it does not help the Hero do better in the polls, at least it’s entertaining!

Last event to date, the Hero issued a commercial featuring Obama meeting his fans in Berlin and compares him to Paris Hilton – who’s regarded as a light-headed person by most Americans. The war Hero knows that nobody would ever want Paris Hilton to command to tanks and aircrafts (see statement #1 above). The commercial is available in the Video Library that I just added to this blog (see the left bar, or click here for a new window). Pathetic.

Bad luck. The Hero’s staff (which is definitely lazy) did not think of asking Paris if she does not mind being casted in a McCain commercial. And as light-headed as she might be, she did not want to serve that cause.

I came across Paris’ video-answer as I wondered about the crazy laugh of a colleague of mine – and an Obama supporter – watching a clip on YouTube (also available in this blog’s video library). A great moment of politics, and, somewhat surprisingly, of intelligence!

Wearing a swimming suit, Paris announces that she is honored to be endorsed by McCain for her presidential campaign and that she also has a plan to address the energy crisis: drilling more oil and transferring the extra income to the green industry. More importantly, she revealed that she’ll paint the White House in pink as she’ll be taking taking office. Being a star does not prevent you from having great ideas … And I must say that Paris’ energy plan sounds just as good to me as the Hero’s plan!

Poor Hero is still not feeling the heat of the projectors, and there is a good bet that his “negative campaign” won’t serve his candidacy at all. It is a pity, because the man has been well considered for his integrity and is regarded as a conservative renovator (he said he’ll learn how to use a computer during the summer, ie!). The problem is not his lack of ideas, it’s his camp’s. Not enough conservative they say. So he follows the advice of the “staff”, which is lazy, and leaves his own beliefs behind. Poor Hero.

The Star also faces some issues. One of them is that he actually IS regarded as a Star. Too much glitter, champagne and friends abroad. A candidate “bling bling” in short. Does it remind you of someone? (1)

(1) French president Sarkozy is often called “President bling bling” because of his extravagance.